“I kissed a girl” – now look at me!
I’ve worked in the club and nightlife scene for quite a few years now and have earned the claim to “ been there done that”. I remember after the breakup with my 4 year highschool boyfriend, I was like a starving lioness just released from her cage. I was hungry and desperately seeking excitement, boys, empowerment, identity, confidence and all that other growing pain stuff you go through in your late teens and early twenties. I eventually learnedthat through trial and error that hanging out with gangsters and flaunting my sexuality was the wrong kind of “empowerment”. After a few years of being a wanabe gangster girl, rave chich, boy crazed club diva, I realized that what I was really getting was a fogged and misled perpective – a perpective born from insecurity, ego and lack of true, grounded values.
When it becomes a typical occurrence of seeing girls making out with each other at nightclubs pretty much with a big “LOOK AT MEE PLEASE?!!” sign, or the photo exhibitionism of girls “les-ing” out on Facebook, it makes me wonder – why? Is there a point or statement that is trying to be made? Or perhaps it’s just good ol’ fun? Hey, if you are into girls, guys, parrots – whatever – all the power to ya. But I get the sense that instead of natural PDA – its really a display of attention seeking behavior mirrored by the latest Hollywood trend of lesbian chic. And I think that’s lame.
Why does it bother me? One part because it’s so contrived and obvious and I think it contributes to maintaining certain female stereotypes and negative assumptions. Second, I have witnessed how easy it is to go down the path of masking unfulfillment and lack of true empowerment and where that can path can lead to if your blinders aren’t taken off.
Anyway, I’ll leave off my rant with this. Girls who pretend to like girls and perform intense makeout routines in public to get the attention from boys -you don’t look cool!
why do you let others bother you. mind your own business who cares if they are kissing. what makes others feel good let them be. u claim to be the happiest person in the world yet you have others other you. !!! ?
Thank you Jamie for reading and for taking the time to comment. First of all, I don’t claim to be the happiest girl in the world – I have days when I feel happy and positive and I have days when I am restless or frustrated or down. I have no issue with people having fun whether that be making out with girls, guys, whatever. But I am raising a point that there are those that do it just to seek attention, acceptance, and perhaps a sense of empowerment. My point is, the intention and the contrived nature is obvious, and that the energy that is reciprocated is not one that empowers.
Well written and well thought out rant, and impressive forthrightness
Haha! I totally hear you. Those shows don’t need to be so transparent. Makes me laugh. And um note to those girls: not all guys are into watching two girls kiss. This isn’t American Pie.